Haven't you ever wondered about the author? I mean...who makes this stuff up?
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The author takes time out of his busy schedule every week to donate fertilizer to his neighbor's flower garden. (Actually, the author's neighbor doesn't need to know about this...)
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The author eats pathos and excretes pathologically.
The author self-censors, self-abuses, self-entertains and self-selects, yet still seeks the approval of his scant readership to prove to himself that he exists.
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